TV Viewing...

Last week was TV Turn-off week and we had a fun time at the Thursday event at the Dow Center. I had a wonderful time singing with the families that made the rounds of fun things to do. One family proved to me they don't watch all the TV they could by singing one of their favorite songs about numbers and vowels...in Spanish. What a treat for me to watch the Dad playing my guitar and his daughter looking way into his eyes while they sang.

A few of the very young toddlers brought their parents back to my little area two and three times. One mom said "OK, just one more song then we're going."......."OK, just one more...." Then she said "Hi! We're back!" Her precious daughter loved the scarf play and jingling with bells...what fun!

I hope some families will have noticed that it's not so hard to be TV free....it's precious family time.

A few years ago I heard the author, Thomas Lewis, author of "A General Theory of Love".He spoke of his work with troubled teens. The statistics he shared of youth violence really pierced the heart. Then he was asking questions about how we learn empathy and gave some recommendations for working with troubled teens (and what teens don't have a zillion troubling questions all through the day...). His prescription was to mandate the family to have a minimum of 5 meals a week together with absolutely nothing electronic (no TV, radio, games, Ipods, computers, nothing) and that the family just TALK. He said one does not have to talk about anything stressful...just talk. When you talk you naturally look at each other. Something very important happens when you look at someone in the eyes during even the in most insignificant of conversations. And it has something to do with empathy....a very important skill.

Why is something that sounds SO simple SO hard to do?

In our house we often find ourselves still at the table with empty plates 45 minutes later....or more....deep in a great discussion....

You've got to start somewhere. Now is a good time.

Reading, Sensory Integration, and YOUR CHILD

Teaching our Children to Read, Write and Spell
by Susan Johnson, M.D
Proprioceptive System
There is a widely-held belief that if we just start teaching children to write, read, and spell in preschool, they will become better writers, readers, and spellers by the time they reach the first and second grades. This is, however, not true. The truth is that children only should be taught to write, read, and spell when their neurological pathways for writing, reading, and spelling have fully formed. There are many neuropsychologists, developmental specialists, occupational therapists and teachers who are concerned that our current trend in this country of pushing “academics” in preschool and kindergarten will result in even greater increases in the number of children, particularly boys, diagnosed with attentional problems and visual processing types of learning disabilities.
In order for children to be able to sit still, pay attention, and remember abstract shapes, like letters and numbers, they first need to have developed their proprioceptive system......

Dear families, please, please read the whole article! Print it out and pass it on to their teachers if you wonder why you child can't sit still, makes his 3's backwards, has terrible penmanship, has trouble falling a sleep or staying asleep, seems to be so distractible....What I mean is every parent and every teacher should read this! Really, your child is reacting in a normal way but this way continues if certain developmental needs are not adressed! They need and crave more singing and twirling, jumping and pretending. It is the way children are! But we are trying so hard to win the race to make children learn to read earlier that we are actually losing the marathon altogether!

If you as an adult are involved in your child's Kindermusik class and you get the sense that it's aerobics for the adults then something is RIGHT!! If the children in Kindermusik Imagine That! or Young Child 1-4 say "This is kinda like gymnastics" or "Dance class" then something is VERY right. We are developing neurons and integrating the right and left hemispheres that will better prepare children for their academic tasks ahead!

April 26 - local celebration of TV Turnoff Week at the Dow Center, Hope College, Holland.

National TV Turnoff week is April 21-27.

Family Fun Night - TV Turn Off Event

FREE! At Hope College's Dow Center

Please join the Holland Recreation Division and Holland Community Hospital's Center for Good Health in turning off your TVs and turning into life! TV Turnoff Week is April 21 - 27 and we will be celebrating it with a FREE Family Fun Night at Hope College's Dow Center on Thursday, April 24 from 5 - 8 PM. Please call 355-1130 for more information.

Hope you'll come and join Kindermusik of Holland as we will be there with music and movement and more of the fun ways of being together that you all know so well from your classes.

When my oldest two were little we watched some TV and since the children were always with us they watched too....I distinctly remembered feeling some kind of uncomfortable twinge perhaps in my gut, but it was a physical feeling I had, during some programs' violent moments, during particular portions of the newscasts, and during some suggestive commercials. When I figured out that the twinge of discomfort happened every time I watched even mildly questionable content through the eyes of my children I could no longer sit through the viewing.I knew my non reaction was in fact a condoning of what I saw as a perfectly fine way for adults to behave...especially in front of children. I negotiated with my spouse that we move the TV into the bedroom. That was the first step. It took just a couple more years for me to get the TV moved into the garage! Now I am TV-FREE! and I can't imagine it back. I enjoy the time I now have to read and especially to have conversation with those that I love. I strongly recommend it!

Once the communications company called to ask why we had phone and internet service through them but not the cable. I said "Well probably because we don't own a TV". The silent moment was long and then he gasped and echoed: "You don't have a TV? What do you do then?" My daughter was eavesdropping and she sang out loud enough for all to hear: "WE READ! WE READ!" I told him he should try it and he cleared his throat and said "Oh, I don't think I could do that."

I hope you have the courage to try it...for a week...for longer...for your children....for yourself.

TV Use Pervasive Among Tiniest Tots
Almost two-thirds of kids under 2 watch TV daily, study finds

By Serena Gordon
HealthDay Reporter

(HealthDay News) -- Parents don't seem to be heeding expert pediatrician guidelines that urge a ban on TV watching for their very youngest children.

The American Academy of Pediatrics currently recommends that children 2 and under watch no TV at all.

However, a new study finds that on a typical day, only 37 percent of children between zero and 2 years old watch no television, and as many as one in five youngsters under 2 even have a television placed in their bedrooms. More than half (54 percent) of these tiny tots could turn on the TV themselves............Most often, parents interviewed in the study said they put a TV set in their kid's room because it freed up other TVs in the house for parental use.

"There is a growing body of literature showing that TV in the bedroom is related to a host of negative outcomes. I would strongly urge parents not to put TV in a child's bedroom," said Vandewater.

"There's this belief that TV is helpful to children and may soothe them, but TV activates the brain and actually makes it more difficult to sleep," explained Lucas.

Read the whole article here.

From the American Academy of Pediatrics

1. CONSISTENT, FREQUENT TV VIEWING CAUSES BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS

Consistent, heavy television viewing (more than two hours a day) throughout early childhood can cause behavior, sleep and attention problems. In the new study, "Children's Television Exposure and Behavioral and Social Outcomes at 5.5 Years: Does Timing of Exposure Matter?" researchers assessed data from the Healthy Steps for Young Children national evaluation effort pertaining to the effects of early, concurrent and sustained television exposure at age 2.5 years, and again at age 5.5 years. The effects of having a television in the child's bedroom were measured at age 5.5. Sixteen percent of parents reported
that their child watched television more than two hours a day at age 2.5 years only (early exposure), 15 percent reported that their children watched more than two hours of television daily at 5.5 years only (concurrent exposure), and 20 percent reported more than two hours of television viewing daily at both times (sustained exposure). Forty-one percent of children had a television in their bedroom at age 5.5. Sustained television viewing was associated with sleep, attention and aggressive behavior problems, and externalizing of problem behaviors. Concurrent television exposure was associated with fewer social skills. Having a television in the bedroom was associated with sleep problems and less emotional reactivity at age 5.5. Early exposure to television for more than two hours a day, which decreased over time, did not cause behavior or social problems. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends no television viewing for children under age 2, and no more than two hours of daily media exposure for ages 2 and older.

From the Center for Screentime Awareness:

Screens & Young Children

SCREEN-TIME Fact Sheet…
Screens & Very Yong Children

5. Research now indicates that for every hour of television children watch each day, their risk of developing attention-related problems later increases by ten percent. For example, if a child watches three hours of television each day, the child would be thirty percent more likely to develop attention deficit disorder.--D. Christakis, Pediatrics, April 2004

What's the magic word?????

Please say Please! Pretty please? With a cherry on top?

How do you get a child to use those magic words? Do you beg and plead.... "I SAID: SAY PLEASE!!!"... while hovering the wanted item just overhead enough to be interpreted as a cruel tease?

Do you stand firm? Keeping in mind being consistent? And everyday it's the same thing! "C'mon! How many times do I have to ask you? And now you're gonna cry??" Who's more stubborn? You or the 2 year old? Are you?....Insisting on your way until the battle of the wills leaves only carnage on the field?

I noticed my good friend locking horns with her toddler and she said "Yvette, what should I do???" The stand-off was unbearable! Her intention was only the best; we do want our children to at least know how to be polite!

When my child says "More!" I say please for them the instant before I put it in their hands. When the neighbor mom hands them another cookie I whispered "please" with a catching of the eye right at the end of my child's "Can I have another cookie?" (that usually brought the echo of their own "Please!").

I'm a pushover. I'm way too easy. One might think my children would grow up knowing only that things get handed to them...but I say look carefully at what your children are learning because NOTHING sneaks by them. Are they learning how to tease? Be stubborn and inflexible? How to be demanding? That big people are more powerful? That when they are the adults they will wield power over smaller people? Are they learning to be resentful? And what about the message on the conditionality of your love?

Where did I come up with this line of thinking, this mellow, trusting philosophy? I'm not sure. Probably from a wise mom in a mom's circle or neighborhood playgroup. But understanding the deep messages has been a quest of mine since the beginnings of the wondering expressions surfacing on my children's faces.

When babies are born we adults witness the cutting of the ubilical chord. For some reason we neglect to explain to the baby that that means we are now separate from them!! They just do not get that concept till well into their 3rd and 4th year. So, take advantage of it! If you encourage behaviors by acting FOR the child when they are still toddlers, when they still believe that you and they are one in being, then they believe they have made the action themselves. If YOU say please without a pause they are sure it came out of their mouth! As they mature and realize how that sentence works the magic word comes naturally... And if you tack on "Thank you!" they will get that too.

Ahhhhh, bypass all the other lessons of stubbornness, power and teasing. Now you are teaching trust and unconditional love.

EARTH DAY

Get ready for earth day this Thursday, April 22.
Please take a minute everyday before then and then a bunch of times on Thursday to hold appreciation for our earth in your heart. Watching this video is an easy way to conjure up appreciation...it's only 2 minutes long.

Thank you,
Yvette

Music the Universal Language

Listen and watch this AMAZING story of children and music from Venezuela. This program takes children who are the poorest of the poor and puts music in their hands....puts the making of music in their hands. Music will change your life if you let it. A 17 year old juvenile delinquent said this about having a clarinet in his hand: "It's completely different than when you hold a gun."


What do you think would happen if we did something like this for all the preschoolers in our country? How about the children in West Michigan that are being swayed by gangs right now?(We spend more money on the penitentiary system than on higher education in our state....)

Peace,
Yvette
Thanks Lori

Let's get rolling, and jumping and singing and twirling! The wide variety of SUMMER CLASSES
are online now and starting to fill. You won't want to miss this summer adventure that doesn't require car trips to far states, driving to the ocean, flying to easter Europe....it's all right here in Holland! Get the family involved and jump right in. This could be the most meaningful summer activity on your planner.

Free film showing and discussion at Herrick Library

LAKESHORE WOMEN FOR PEACE

(www.ls-women-for-peace.blogspot.com)

Presents

Pathways to Simpler Living

A short film about the Life Cycle Story of Stuff

Discussion to follow.

Explore the ways stuff affects the quality of life.

HERRICK DISTRICK LIBRARY AUDITORIUM

Tuesday April 8, 2008 7:00 PM

FREE

Parenting with Nonviolent Communication (NVC)

Oh, dear parents, spare a minute to listen to this. I've read Marshall Rosenberg's books on Non-violent Communication and they have greatly influenced how I parent and how I teach. The speaker in this video was wonderful to keep asking "WHY????"