To the MOMs

Dear Moms,
Are you aware that MOM is WOW upside down? That is a given. Forwards and backwards. No other judgment necessary!

A few years ago I began a conscious journey of self improvement and have as a mantra to "love others as myself". Interestingly I noticed I didn't love myself very much and surely not unconditionally! During times when I loved myself least I was less able to love others at all.
How could I love others, especially my own family, if I could not love myself.

Baby steps. Baby steps. Two steps forward and one back.

Here are two ideas that helped me with the one step forward.

Accept compliments.

Wouldn't you know it? I have still lots of work to do here! Today after playing flute in church I totally negated a freely given compliment! I will choose next time to say: "Thank you" and allow it to soak in.

Second: Stop "should-ing all over myself".

I think most moms are in the habit of using this technique. "I should have returned that call yesterday". "I should have gotten up earlier." "I should post more often on my blog." "I should have practiced that music."Should-a should-a, should-a....., Goodness, I can come up with a bunch of them. There's a lot of judgmental energy being used up in feeling angry or frustrated at myself for what should have been! How is that going to help anything? The word "should" matters too in saying what we might do in the future. "I should run to the store". "I should drop a card in the mail." "I should clean up as I go." I choose to replace "should-a" with "I could" and then decide whether or not I will. I can always change my mind but I don't need the nagging sound of that voice saying "You should have.......".

If you are an educator and you are reading this you might want to know more. I've been reading Becky Bailey's work book for teachers "Conscious Discipline". But if you are a parent reading this then you could choose to run out and get this book because it can help you transform your parenting.

Thanks for listening. Because you know I say this for my own sake.
Yvette